Monday, 22 December 2008

You've Vanished

I guess you have just been busy but You've kinda vanished!
I just got your voicemail took me dialling Voicemail instead of using visual voicemail cos I think it's having a blip. Nearly down to 1 and a half days till Christmas break.

I'm off from lunchtime on the 24th right through till the 5th (well the 5th is back at work day). I've booked some holiday as i need to use it up.

You could come down here that Friday afternoon and I'd still be about as I'd be off but I guess its up to you.

H :)

Sunday, 7 December 2008


I wrote this earlier on my blog but I wanted you to see as well. It's kinda addressed to another friends rather than you lol but it is addressed to you in a way - if that makes sense. 

Today I've been having a real rough day. I was ok this morning but then about lunchtime it just hit me and I felt so down and like everything was majorly wrong. So much so that when I got home I got into bed fully dressed and stayed there like an hour and a half - I just couldn't think of what to do.

I felt a bit better after that and got up and didn't my normal bits and pieces that I do on a Sunday. When I got back from 24/7 this evening this song just kept ringing round my brain.

I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines
We've been conditioned to not make mistakes, but I can't live that way

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins

These are the lyrics from Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield. I always have liked this song since it came out and I never get fed up of hearing it. I love the bit

"Feel the rain on your skin, No one else can feel it for you, Only you can let it in"

I have a friend. I'm not going to say where I know him from or his name or stuff like that because then people who read this will know who I'm talking about but hopefully those kind of details will be vague enough that I can talk about it. So I have a friend, he's a bit older than me and for about 75% of the time I've known him he's had depression in varying degrees. I'm kinda writing this bit of the post to him. You know who you are! As the lyric goes only you can let it in, yeah I know that it seems like the big black cloud just keeps getting bigger and you can't find the way through but one day it could be tomorrow it could be next year (preferably the first but we'll pray for either as only God knows when he's going to go) that big black cloud is going to break and it's going to start raining and in the end the cloud will clear and the sunshine will come out again. I know I'm not exactly in the best place at the moment as I seem to be up and down like a rollercoaster but you are my friend and I will be here, whether it's reading emails that you send with how you are feeling or babysitting so you can have a break for an evening. I am here and I will help whichever and however I can.

I try not to let my friends down because they mean the world to me. You were there back in November when I needed my friends so now it's my turn to return it.

Thursday, 4 December 2008

Ok what is going on?!

I swear the cold weather has made some of the people in my office turn into really mean people! Monday there was a really bitchy comment aimed at me and earlier there was one as well (the one earlier didn't hurt as much thankfully but Monday's one really got me!)

Anyhoo work must b done :)