Wednesday, 1 October 2008

I am officially a man spazz!

OK, so in a nutshell i am a stoooooooooooooopid, pathetic spazzed out idiot when it comes to men!

To cut a long story short.... I met a guy (for the sake of blog he will be known as Fe) on my birthday night out in sheffield... it sounds a bit slushy and untrue but this is how it happened...

I was out with a friend and sitting (coz i cant really dance due to injuries)by the window. The place was packed! This guy came to take our photo and as he was preparing one this other guy (Fe) walked by and smiled at me! i told my friend that this "fit" guy had looked at me and she said, is it the guy still lookin.... it was! i thought he was lookin at the pretty types behind me!

I went up to the loo on my own (wouldnt normally but we wanted to keep the seats). He was upstairs on the balcony. Spoke a few words to me and it turned out he's from bedford!!!! where i used to live at uni! we went down to meet my friend so she wasnt on her own as she had already text me to ask if i had abandoned her! his friends joined too...

We chatted.... and chatted.... and chatted a bit more... in fact we chatted near enough all night! He spoilt me rotton with cocktails and champagne for my birthday (and not in an attempt to get me drunk)!

Anyway the following day i got asked out on a date the following monday. I took him up on the offer. We had a lovely day.... best date i've been on for ... like... ages! we got on so well and found out more about each other! and i got a proper drink of yorkshire tea... like when i was little visiting my nan!

We had messaged on fb and msngr a fair bit between the saturday night and the meeting on the monday morning... was all v lovely. monday night things sort of went quiet... and tuesday. by wednesday i was feelin quite poop! lots of things went round in my head and i got into spaghetti junction (phychologically and emotionally of course). i think my heart was trying to rule my head but it was being blocked by the mess... i dunno. so i text him and fb messaged him... i got a reply sayin sorry he was busy at work... this hadnt even gone into my head.

Anyway. we spoke tonight and i think i was a tad harsh. I asked him straight what was going on between us.... he said he really likes me. feels bad for making me feel confused and explained a lot to me.... i will not publish on here though as i cant type about another persons feelings really.

I am still a little unsure but we will see what happens and take things slow. we have both been out of long relationships for a long time so dont want to end up hurt.

Already i actually really really really like Fe. I dont want to exactly tell him because he's under a lot of different pressures at the moment and i dont want him to think he needs to make any decisions. If we end up an item i think he will make me a v happy young lady indeed...... i sound like a geek now i know but after sarge, no one has come close to making me feel positive about being in a relationship. Fe makes me smile a lot and he's so caring... such a cuddly person!

I dont want to muck this up and i just hope Fe realises how much i do like him and how much of an idiot i was and that he makes me happy again already.

Watch this space i guess... will keep you posted!

As for the rest of my birthday... the best pressie in the whole universe was having my girlies all together in one place again! nothing compares! My bestest friends are most definately the family i chose to have! I love them all dearly and they keep me sane *obviously until a man enters the game!*

Kewey out for now. Hug hugs peoples!

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